Tugboating “The Freighter”

I haven’t done a wall of shame in a while, but this is too out of whack NOT to post about it.

This post probably makes me a bad person.

Every few weeks, I take the Seattle->Bremerton ferry to visit my family on the other side of the water. Due to work and scheduling, I almost always take the 6:45PM ferry. Another character who seems to take this same boat is who I shall call “the freighter.”

The Freighter usually arrives early, and always rockets to the front of the queue line. This wouldn’t all be that unusual except for the critical piece of information that The Freighter actually weighs at least 400 pounds and scoots around in a motorized carriage. The Freighter has no qualms about getting as close as possible to others with her carriage, and apparently likes to go as fast as possible and always be first to leave, and first on.

One of the activities I partake in is what I call “Tugboating.” If I arrive before her, I’ll make sure to get right in the front of the line, and pretend to be tuned out in my music and not noticing her slowly sneaking up to the front of the line. I’ll move ever so slightly out-of-the-way, only to move back and block her. I know this is working: she has a pretty angry face after a few minutes of this.

When we start boarding, she also likes to go as fast as possible and somehow move between people walking. Now imagine a 400lb woman in a scooter that weighs at least another 100 pounds. Now imagine that she has some speed behind her and going downhill. This is downright dangerous, and she tries to go as close as possible. She usually succeeds in passing everyone, probably because everyone else is scared of getting their legs broken by The Freighter.

I often participate in Tugboating at this stage as well. I’ll work to block all of the gaps in the people walking, so she can’t pass anyone and gets stuck somewhere. This is even more redeeming, as she often says “excuse me” in an angry voice and tries to get through anyway.

Yes, this is probably the highlight of my weekend.

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