Why Lord of the Rings Didn’t Use Instant Messaging

(12:31:00 PM) Cory Rain Peasley: “I see youuuu”
(12:31:12 PM) Nikky Southerland: O.o
(12:31:29 PM) Nikky Southerland: *hides*
(12:31:40 PM) Cory Rain Peasley: “the great eye sees all”
(12:31:46 PM) Nikky Southerland: :-|
(12:31:54 PM) Nikky Southerland: I need to drop something in Mt. Doom
(12:32:17 PM) Cory Rain Peasley: don’t you dare!
(12:32:41 PM) Nikky Southerland: It’s not very important.
(12:32:43 PM) Nikky Southerland: Just a trinket.
(12:32:49 PM) Nikky Southerland: Don’t worry about it.
(12:33:07 PM) Cory Rain Peasley: Oh ok
(12:33:09 PM) Nikky Southerland: Really, I should get the really fucking big eagles to do it.
(12:33:30 PM) Cory Rain Peasley: well I all ready released the nine so…
(12:34:06 PM) Nikky Southerland: Figure three eagles each, so that’s 27 to distract the wraiths.
(12:34:08 PM) Cory Rain Peasley: and I don’t want to call them back, you know how roaming charges are
(12:34:15 PM) Nikky Southerland: And three sneak in.
(12:34:40 PM) Cory Rain Peasley: my plan is only good for Mordor
(12:34:52 PM) Nikky Southerland: I know! Gondor Cellular has terrible coverage these days.
(12:35:53 PM) Cory Rain Peasley: those pompus bastards, city on the hill.. mummble mumble…
(12:36:36 PM) Nikky Southerland: Don’t worry. I hear they’ll get stomped soon enough.
(12:39:13 PM) Cory Rain Peasley: Yeah, I’m sending in herigions form the south with Elefants and everything, plus there’s pirates coming up the river.. and oh wait, why am I telling you this-_-
(12:39:42 PM) Nikky Southerland: I’m going to call this one ranger I know.
(12:41:17 PM) Cory Rain Peasley: what power does a ranger have against the might of souron and soromon?
(12:41:26 PM) Cory Rain Peasley: shit
(12:41:43 PM) Cory Rain Peasley: you didn’t know about soromon yet did you?
(12:41:55 PM) Cory Rain Peasley: no bother
(12:42:30 PM) Nikky Southerland: I heard rumors.
(12:42:33 PM) Nikky Southerland: Terrible rumors.
(12:43:22 PM) Cory Rain Peasley: you should copy this whole transcript and post it up as “why the Lord of the Rings didn’t use facebook instant chat”