On the way to the #tcpa meetup, Katy, Duncan and I rode an Amtrak train to Portland. We soon realized that there was a lady sitting in front of us who was either a complete idiot or was drunk at 9 in the morning.
What follows is but a snippet of her brilliant observations.
“I think we’re going under the bridge”
“Oh! There’s a foxglove growing!”
“Oh! There it goes! It IS a sister train!” (When we pulled off the main line to let
another Amtrak train pass in the opposite direction)
“We’re going faster now! Can you feel it?”
“Have we gone through Olympia yet?” (20 minutes after stopping
at the Olympia station)
“I’ve never been to Centralia before!” (If she had ever been on I-5 south she has been in Centralia)
“Soneone needs to come down here and sell them siding!”
“There’s no toilet paper in there!”
“I did find the toilet seat covers this time”
“When do those kids find the time to graffiti those trains?”
“Did you hear about the one on Lake Union that caught fire and literally burned?”
“See those sweet peas? When I go for a walk at lunch time I pick them and
tape them to my computer. I guess I need a vase”
I think near the end they might have suspected something when we ducked
down in our seats andstarted laughing (not to mention writing it down!) after
she started talking. We didn’t care.
She is the kind of person who needs to be constitutionally forced to have her
head separated from the rest of her body.
Did I mention her travel mates decided to get her a screwdriver drink
midway through the ride?